aaaaand, I'm BLACK! SHOUT OUT BLOG!

What's up HOLLYWEIRDS? I am back from up north, and am glad to be home in our 90 degree heats.  Although I did ENJOY gettin all rained in with my friends Darren and Rufus in SF and eatin till I put on an extra 5 lbs of comfort, I must admit, I like it hots, boos, and I needs it to sweat off all dis "water weight." I do apologize that I was unable to  update my blog whilst in the midst of full on FALL (in loves) in SF and Sacramento.
Here's what I was up to:

Interview with the NOTORIOUS JOE, dis bitch and I was separated at birfs.  She is a sistra fo shizzle. Check out our times together HERE.

GHETTO DISCO with DJ David Hawthorne proved to be the PERFECK blend of nassy and classy. Although I could have done without the skrange man from Germany rubbing up on me and tellin me that, "bonerz is natural" on the dance flo, to which I replied, "so is my fiance's fist in yo face, bitch!" Can't a Ho just be a bride to be? I had a BLAST. Caroline Lund is my sista fo life and DJ Hawthorne and I will be teaming up in the future and bringin GhettoDisco to LA on a monthly basis, just like my period, honey! Come on out dis Saturday!

Pollo Del Mar covered my show at the Triple Crown in San Francisco real cutes! You can read about it HERE.  I really had such an amazing time in SF and in Sacramento.  When you tryins to grow a ho, it takes a village and these people show and PROVED, honey.  I hope it continues to grow, so I can continue to HO, you feels me?  There were peeps there that knew every damn werd to everythang I was layin downs, and of course everytime I get people to sing the chorus on "OPRAH WINFREY," a tranny becomes a woman! Loves it.  Gilbert Pickett, please grab the fruit one mo times!!

Sacramento. Badlands. So glad to see my crew out showin some proper love to a ho.  Ron and TJ at Da Badlands made it SO much cuter than last time.  Please don't put a ho back at The Depot, bitches.  Extra special thanks to my girls: Sonia Castro and Cyndi Mitchell Paul for always knowin how to handle a ho, and oh my gah....Mark Snyder, in spite of the fact that you is a gay Republicantz, I will love you forever for havin a gotdamn HO PRIDE PARADE in the middle of my set.  You were THERE, BOO!!! John Kalinowski, yo presence was felt, gurl.

It is a damn long road to ho, y'alls, but I am grateful and blessed to know that anybody gives a FUCK about what I does in this age of everybody bein a "star." My prayer and advice is, "PLEASE HAVE TALENT TO BACK UP THE PRODUCTION, BITCHES--or AT LEAST be like Kim Zolciak, in which case,  ignunce makes up for the lack of talent."

Tonight I'm at Karaoke in West Hollywoods Hamburger Marys!  Gonna be SO stoopits.  MeeMaw's Pussy. Poop Noodle. Fuck Me. Oprah Winfrey. I'll be singin em.  You be singin what, Ho? What, what?