s.o.

Dis be my flow. Dat's what flow be. You sits on a maxipad and lets it flow. You sit down by the river bank and watch it flow. Dat's right Toni (woo!) Braxton..."So let go, let it flow, let it flow, let it flow. Woo!" Toni gots a sister named Towanda--how you know dat, ho?
Well I know dat cuz Towanda was on my favorite tv show--Startins Ovra--you know the show where dey gots all dem womens livin in a house togethra, workin through they shit with the help of dey life coaches: Rhonda, Iyanla, Dr. Stanz--he gay I think. My favorite episodes are where Iyanla Vanzant (In The Meantime, Yesterday I Cried) pushes these womens to they breaking point and then says something really profound through her Miss Celie lookin mouf:
"because this is YOUR LIFE!!!!!---FIGHT FOR YOUR LIFE!" or my personal favorite, (after giving someone who was a total FAKE (Tess) a big hug) "dat's right, baby, its all gon' be okay......now go find somebody and tell them the TRUTH!"
nothin like fightin the good fight on national TV.
Speakins of fightin the good fight, I'm bout to put my foot up somebody's ass over at Channel 4 tv. Startins Over be my favorite show, I know I already said that--but fo' real y'all dis be just about the only TV that I watch. BUT you know its GHETTO, and when its GHETTO, my people, its ALWAYS somesin.
About 3 weeks ago I came home after workins and turned on my tv/vcr combo. I had taped Startins Ovra ode school way--programmed it into my vcr...and who should be up in my mug, but Judgin MuthaFuckin Judy.
First of all--I hate court tv shows...unless its divorce court and the couple is toe up and ghetto:
"you know what he did to me?...he looked at me...he roll his eye..and SUCKED HIS TEEF, YO' HONOR!"
Second of all
JUDGE JUDY
JUDY
JUDY
She look like a brunette Joan Rivers, who look like a blonde chinese gargoyle
She ain't a real Judge, and she always be cuttin peoples off in the middle of dey sentences...rulin dat cote room with an iron fist, dat Judy is. Well bitch! I got an iron maiden cunt and I be damned if any Judgin, doilie wearin curmudgeon gonna suck up my air time.
So I wrote a real professional note to Channel 4--
Dear Channel FO-
give us back da Startins Ovra...nobody like Judge Judy..not even my Grandma who loves Court TV and QVC. Turn it off...please!!!
and dey cleared up da prahlem by puttin Startins Ovra back on my tv....2 weeks later.
Is that the end of dis story?
HELL NO...
CUZ like I said when it be GHETTO...dare's ALWAYS somesin...
so I'm clickin along catchin back up with my gurls in dey house...and 2 days later?
STARTINS OVRA RE-RUNS FROM THE COUPLE'S STARTINS OVRA DAT I ALREADY DUN SAWS.
what the fuck?
Me and Toni Braxton over here holdin hands now. She lookin in my eyes, I lookin at the duck tape dat's barely holdin up her left titty.
She point at the tv, startins over is on re-run
I point at her duck tape
We laugh and look into each othra's eyes..
We singin softly together and tears rollin down our faces.
"It's ghetto, let it go, let it flow, its ghet-to" (Toni: "woo!")